Life’s 4 Most Important Decisions

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By Gabriel Gonsalves

Personal mastery, leadership development, and spiritual growth with the heart in mind. 

Are you living your own life, or a life laid out by others? This week, I’d like to encourage you to reclaim your personal narrative by exploring four pivotal decisions that will shape the quality of your life and your future existence. These decisions could significantly impact your satisfaction and fulfillment. We’ll also discuss the common feelings of unworthiness and how they should not hinder your pursuit of a life that truly reflects your desires and values.

Many of us live a life of quiet resignation. We follow the path laid out by our family, friends, and society, striving to meet their expectations. We work diligently, investing countless hours in the pursuit of success, only to find ourselves feeling as if we’re living someone else’s life, not the life we once dreamt of.

This situation often arises because we neglect to deeply consider and explore what I believe are life’s four most important decisions. Investing the time, energy, and effort that these decisions truly deserve can lead to a significant shift in your current level of satisfaction.

Life’s 4 Most Important Decisions

Decision #1: Who you want to be

Choosing who you want to be in this life, rather than allowing others to make that choice for you, holds great power. Ask yourself, “Who would I love to be? What kind of person do I aspire to become? What are the qualities or virtues I’d like to develop? How do I want to be known and remembered by others?”

Decision #2: What you want to do

What is the cause, activity, or project you would love to dedicate your life to? What are you naturally drawn to that you’d like to master? Is there something that you do so easily that you could create a business around it, or even get highly paid to do it? Making a conscious decision about where to focus your energy can help eliminate wasteful activities that drain your life force.

Decision #3: Where you want to live

Your living environment can significantly influence your life’s trajectory, the people you meet, and the experiences you encounter. If you plan to live somewhere for a decade, it’s worth your while to spend time considering what makes that place ideal for you. Ask yourself, “What kind of place would I love to live in? What kind of environment would inspire me to be the most creative, joyful, and loving version of myself?”

Decision #4: Who you want to be with

Be clear about the kind of people you want to surround yourself with. Identify their qualities, values, and worldviews. If you’re considering a romantic relationship, ask yourself, “What are the qualities I’m seeking in a partner?” If you’re currently in a relationship with someone you don’t envision marrying, it may be time to let them go to make room for someone who better aligns with your desires.

Overcoming the Feeling of Undeserving…

If you find yourself thinking, “Yes, I understand all of this, but I just don’t feel deserving or worthy of having what my heart yearns for. Moreover, I don’t know how to escape the life and relationships I’ve already established. Perhaps I should simply accept this as the best I’ll ever achieve…”

Here’s what I want you to know:

Your feelings of worthiness are not the issue.

To clarify, many of my clients who now lead lives filled with chosen lifestyles, relationships, and careers also grapple with feelings of unworthiness. I often hear them say, “I sometimes feel like an impostor and undeserving of all this.”

Here’s the truth:

They have what they have now because one day, they dared to dream bigger and commit to pursuing what their hearts desired. They made a choice about who they wanted to be, who they wanted to be with, where they wanted to live, and what they wanted to do.

And they committed to these choices.

I invite you to do the same because it all starts with the quality of the choices you make today and the small steps you start taking.

Who do you want to be? What do you want to do? Where do you want to live? Who do you want to be with?

Investing time, energy, and perhaps even money into answering these questions is your first step in creating the life, relationships, and career your heart secretly yearns for.

From my heart to yours,