Imagine standing at the edge of a vast canyon, looking toward the other side where your vision for your life awaits. You know you’re capable of building the bridge that will take you across—but the tools feel heavy, the materials seem insufficient, and there’s a voice inside your head that whispers, “Do you have what it takes?”
That voice isn’t unfamiliar to any of us. I heard it loudly last year when I faced a crossroads in my own journey—feeling called to expand my work while simultaneously questioning if I had the capacity to do so.
This is the space I find myself navigating right now.
It’s a place of uncertainty and growth—a space where the demands of life ask us to become more than we’ve been before. Seth Godin calls this “the dip”—a moment where after choosing a different direction, moving forward feels harder than ever, where giving up might seem easier than continuing.
You might recognize this feeling in your own life: perhaps in the moment before launching a new project, stepping into a new role, or making a decision that will irrevocably change your path and therefore your entire life. That flutter in your stomach, the tightness in your chest—they’re not signs to retreat, but signals that you’re at the threshold of transformation.
But here’s the truth I’ve been rediscovering: when the path feels hard, it’s not about doing more. It’s about becoming more.
When you focus on who you are being, the actions you need to take arise naturally. The bridge starts to form, not through force or strain, but through alignment with the kind of person you wish to become.
How Aligning with the Kind of Person You Wish to Become Changes Everything
There’s a misconception that the only way to solve life’s challenges is to work harder, push through, and do more. But in my experience, the harder we push while disconnected from our being, the more resistance and exhaustion we create.
Research in positive psychology confirms this intuition: studies show that when you operate from authentic presence rather than reactive stress, your decision-making improves by up to 40%. Your nervous system literally functions differently when you lead from being rather than frantic doing.
When I shift my focus inward—toward embodying qualities like courage, trust, and authenticity—the doing becomes lighter. It feels less like a chore and more like a natural flow.
The right words for that email come effortlessly. The courage to ask for support feels less terrifying. The solutions to difficult challenges become clear.
I witnessed this transformation in a client who had been struggling with burnout in her executive role. For months she’d been working harder, staying later, and growing more exhausted. When we shifted her focus to embodying the calm, confident person she aspired to be—rather than just checking more boxes—her team’s performance improved, her satisfaction returned, and ironically, she accomplished more while doing less. She discovered how to transform challenges rather than just survive them.
Why? Because her actions were no longer rooted in fear or scarcity—they were rooted in alignment with who she was choosing to be.
To Transform Challenges: Who Do You Need to Be?
As you navigate your own challenges, ask yourself this question: “Who do I need to be to move through this moment?”
Take a breath right now and place your hand on your heart. Feel the steady rhythm beneath your palm. What quality is being called forth in you during this season of your life? What new qualities is life asking you to develop and fully embody? Let the answer emerge not from your thinking mind, but from the wisdom of your heart.
Here are some of the qualities I’ve come to see as essential for stepping into the next stage of my life’s work:
1. Courageous
Courage is not the absence of fear, but the willingness to act in its presence. It’s saying, “I may not have all the answers, but I’m willing to take the next step.”
When you embody courage, you’re not paralyzed by what-ifs. You trust yourself to figure it out along the way.
Think about the first time you tried something new—maybe asking for a raise, sharing a vulnerable story, or launching a project. It probably felt terrifying, but the act of moving forward built momentum and confidence.
When I first transitioned from corporate work to heart intelligence coaching, I felt like an imposter. Who was I to guide others? But each time I showed up authentically despite my fear, my capacity expanded. Courage isn’t about becoming fearless—it’s about making fear a passenger rather than the driver.
2. Rooted in Trust
Trust is the foundation of peace. It’s the belief that, even when the way forward isn’t clear, the path will unfold step by step as we continue walking.
When you embody trust, you stop second-guessing yourself. You allow things to unfold without forcing them.
Imagine planting seeds in a garden. You don’t dig them up every day to check if they’re growing—you water them, give them sunlight, and trust the process.
How might your current challenges transform if you approached them with the patience and trust of a gardener? What seeds of possibility could flourish if given space to grow in their own timing?
3. Resilient
Resilience is the ability to adapt, recalibrate, and keep going when things don’t go as planned and become emotionally strong along the way. It’s seeing every obstacle as part of the process.
When you embody resilience, you don’t dwell on setbacks. You redirect your energy toward what’s possible.
When you’ve faced rejection—whether in work, relationships, or personal goals—did you give up, or did you try again? Each time you’ve chosen to try again, you’ve demonstrated resilience.
The most powerful individuals I’ve worked with don’t avoid failure—they transform it into wisdom. One client transformed challenges after a devastating product launch by asking, “What is this teaching me about what my community truly needs?” This is the essence of growth—finding the lesson in every setback.
4. Authentic
Authenticity is showing up as your full self—imperfect, flawed, vulnerable, and powerful. It’s letting go of the masks and trusting that your true self is enough.
When you embody authenticity, you build connections rooted in trust and mutual respect.
Think of someone you admire deeply—not for their perfection, but for their realness. That connection they create comes from their willingness to show up fully as themselves.
Can you recall a time when someone’s vulnerability gave you permission to be more authentic yourself? That ripple effect is the true power of authenticity—it creates spaces where others can remove their masks and be real too.
5. Generous
Generosity isn’t just about giving—it’s about creating space for others to step into their own power. It’s about offering without attachment, knowing that giving and receiving are part of the same flow.
When you embody generosity, your actions come from a place of abundance rather than scarcity.
Reflect on a time when you gave advice, support, or even encouragement to someone else. Did it strengthen them? Did it expand you? Generosity has a way of uplifting both the giver and the receiver.
I’ve found that the moments I’m most stuck are often the moments I’m most self-focused. The antidote? Asking, “How can I serve?” This simple shift from self-consciousness to other-consciousness has unlocked solutions to problems I couldn’t solve through analysis alone.
What Must You Let Go Of?
Transformation requires both embracing new ways of being and releasing what no longer serves us. Like a hot air balloon that can’t rise until it releases its sandbags, your ascent requires lightening your load.
Letting go is one of the hardest parts of growth, but it’s also one of the most powerful. As you step into the next stage of your life, consider releasing:
1. Self-Doubt
Self-doubt whispers that you’re not ready or not good enough. It keeps you stuck, second-guessing every move.
What to do instead: Recognize that self-doubt is a normal part of stepping into the unknown. Use it as a sign that you’re growing, not failing.
Try this: When self-doubt arises, place your hand on your heart and say, “Thank you for trying to protect me. I honor your concern, but I choose to move forward with faith rather than fear.” This practice acknowledges the doubt without letting it dictate your actions.
2. Perfectionism
Perfectionism convinces you that things have to be flawless before they’re worthy. It stops you from taking action altogether.
What to do instead: Focus on progress over perfection. Remember, every “imperfect” action teaches you something valuable.
I once worked with a brilliant writer who couldn’t publish because her work was “never ready.” We created a ritual where she would light a candle and say, “I release this creation as a gift, not as a reflection of my worth.” Within six months, she’d published work that touched thousands—imperfections and all. She learned to transform her challenges related to perfectionism by embracing imperfection as part of her creative process.
3. Scarcity Thinking
Scarcity makes you believe there isn’t enough—time, money, resources. But this mindset creates contraction and closes you off from possibility.
What to do instead: Shift your focus to what is available. Celebrate small wins and practice gratitude for what you already have.
Ask yourself: “What resources—inner and outer—do I already possess that I might be overlooking?” Often, abundance isn’t about acquiring more but recognizing the wealth that’s already present.
4. Comparison
Comparison traps you in measuring your worth by someone else’s journey. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy or envy.
What to do instead: Focus inward. Reflect on how far you’ve come and the unique path you’re on.
Remember: someone else’s success doesn’t diminish the light of your own journey. Their chapter 20 doesn’t invalidate your chapter 5. Your path is uniquely yours, with lessons designed specifically for your growth.
What Must You Embrace?
As you let go of the habits and beliefs that no longer serve you, here’s what you can choose to embrace:
1. Radical Ownership
Take full responsibility for your growth, your decisions, and your results. Ownership doesn’t mean blaming yourself—it means empowering yourself to create change.
This isn’t about carrying the weight of the world alone. Rather, it’s recognizing that while you can’t control everything that happens to you, you always have choice in how you respond. In that response lies your power.
2. Presence
Bring your full attention to the present moment. This is where clarity, peace, and inspiration reside.
When you’re caught in regrets about the past or anxiety about the future, you miss the only moment where change is possible—now. Try this simple practice: three times daily, pause and take three conscious breaths, noticing the sensations in your body. This micro-practice builds the muscle of presence.
3. Authentic Boldness
Be willing to be seen fully for who you are and what you offer. Boldness isn’t about being fearless—it’s about acting in alignment with your truth.
I’ve never forgotten the words of a mentor who told me: “Your voice may shake, your hands may tremble, but speak anyway. The world needs your medicine.” What truth are you hesitating to express? What offering are you holding back? Your authentic voice is the one someone is waiting to hear.
4. Joy in the Journey
Celebrate small victories. Find moments of gratitude and joy, even in the midst of challenges.
Too often you postpone your joy until you reach some future milestone: “I’ll be happy when…” But joy isn’t just the destination—it’s the fuel that powers the journey. What brought you joy as a child? How might you weave small elements of that into your daily life now?
5. Abundance
Practice seeing opportunities, resources, and possibilities instead of focusing on what’s missing. An abundant mindset, like the one you shift into when you listen to my ‘Infinite Abundance’ guided meditation below – opens doors.
The universe operates on principles of expansion, interconnectedness, and generosity—just look at the number of seeds in a single apple, the stars in the sky, the ideas flowing through human consciousness. When you align with this natural abundance, you become a channel for creativity and opportunity rather than closed systems of lack. This mindset helps transform your challenges by revealing hidden possibilities within every situation.
How to Embody the new way of “Being” in Practice
If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure of your next steps, here’s a simple practice to reconnect with your being:
1) Pause and Breathe
Close your eyes, place your hand over your heart, and take three slow, deep breaths.
2) Ask Yourself
“Who do I need to be right now?” Choose one word (e.g., Courageous, Trusting, Present) and repeat it silently.
3) Activate this Feeling
As you continue to breathe into your heart, recall a time in your life when you embodied this way of being. Welcome the feeling into your body of this way of being.
4) Take One Aligned Action
From this state of being, identify one small action you can take to transcend your current challenge or situation. Then, release the outcome as you take it.
5) Celebrate the Shift
Acknowledge yourself for showing up intentionally, regardless of the outcome.
I invite you to try this practice daily for one week. Notice how shifting your focus from “what should I do?” to “who am I being right now?” changes not just your actions, but the energy behind them. Many clients report feeling a sense of lightness and clarity that had been missing when they operated solely from their to-do lists. This practice has helped countless clients transform challenges they once thought insurmountable.
An Invitation to Step Into Your Power
If this message resonates with you, and you’re navigating your own challenges of “becoming,” I’d love to invite you into a conversation.
I believe that within you lies all the wisdom, courage, and clarity you need—sometimes we just need a sacred space and the right questions to access these gifts. That’s what heart-centered coaching provides.
I’m offering a limited number of complimentary coaching sessions this month to help you:
- Clarify who you need to be to move through your current challenges
- Explore what might be holding you back from stepping into that version of yourself
- Identify aligned actions that flow easily from a state of being
These complimentary sessions aren’t about quick fixes or surface-level advice—they’re about creating a container where your own inner wisdom can emerge. Together, we’ll cut through the noise and connect with what truly matters to you in this next chapter.
This isn’t about adding more to your plate—it’s about reconnecting with what’s already inside you and discovering how to transform your challenges through the power of being.
Click Here to Schedule Your Session
You have everything you need to build the bridge to the next stage of your life. Sometimes, you just need another heart to remind you how powerful you are and provide you with additional tools.
Final Thoughts
The path isn’t asking you to do more—it’s asking you to be more. To become more.
Remember the canyon metaphor we began with? The bridge you’re building isn’t just to get to some destination—it’s also becoming the foundation upon which others will cross their own divides. To transform your challenges, you must grow yourself into the kind of person who no longer has those challenges. That’s how you transcend them.
So, I leave you with these question:
Who is your path asking you to become? What new qualities must you embrace? What must you let go of?
Not tomorrow when conditions are perfect, not when you have more time, resources, or feel confident—but today, in this very moment, with everything exactly as it is.
From my heart to yours,
